No canoe is good canoe

A while back I went up to the U.P. with my friend Andy to check out a mining festival (details on that HERE) held every year in Caspian Michigan. Considering our interest in blacksmithing, this seemed like a great chance to do some research on the subject. It also turns out that Andy’s grandmother lives up there and his folks have a house on a lake in the area so we planned on staying there while we were up there. Once we arrived, we unloaded our stuff and went to have dinner with Andy’s grandmother. After dinner we went back to the house and Andy suggested we take the canoe out on the lake. I said that was a great idea, I haven’t been in a canoe since I was in middle school. So we got the canoe down by the pier and I stood looking at it. Andy explained that I should sit up front and he would sit in the rear because he was more experienced in canoeing than I was. With some coaching I got into the canoe and sat down.

It was right about then I noticed a slight sense of unease begin to poke around my consciousness. As Andy got in and we sunk a little lower in the water the unease gradually gained some strength and emerged as agitation. Since I can, sort of, swim and I’ve been in a canoe before, I berated myself for this childish behavior. However, as we began paddling out into the lake and as my movements seemed to cause the canoe to wiggle like a hula girls hips, my agitation erupted into near full blown panic. I immediately grabbed the sides of the canoe and began informing Andy that I was fully content with our journey and would be interested in returning to the dock. In fact I think my precise phrasing was something like-

“OKwellthatsaboutenoughofthisimgoodtogobackwecangobacknowbacktothedockthatwouldbegoodthankyouverymuch!!!”

Andy tried to reassure me everything was fine but I would not be dissuaded so Andy, being quite the talented Scout, put the canoe in reverse and took us back where I clambered out of the canoe and reassessed my world with the new knowledge that I’ve become a sissy with regards to small water vessels. I previously had no idea this was the case. With my dignity in ruins we headed out to check out a local bar and after watching some extreme sports and winning a couple of games of pool, my machismo was sufficiently restored and we retired back to the house to watch action movies and crash.

As I think about this situation, I don’t believe my interactions with canoes are at an end. I’d like to overcome this, what I consider a, ridiculous fear so I will keep you updated. Until then, hook me up with a pontoon boat or leave me on the shore.