5 Days in Missouri - Zombie Con 2012

Hey everyone, It’s been quite a long time since I last posted and I apologize but life has been hectic. I’ll cover that some other time. For this post I am going to tell you about 5 days in June I spent in Missouri. I belong to a group called Zombie Squad. Zombie Squad (please check out their website HERE) in a collection of people interested in disaster preparedness. I have been a member since 2009 and am an active member and supporting officer in charge of the Wisconsin territory for the Chicago Chapter ZS:020. I have met some outstanding people in this organization. I have also learned a great deal about myself and the world around me just by being in contact with these people. Every year Zombie Squad holds an event called “Zombie Con” which goes from Wednesday through Sunday in which members backpack up onto a mountain in the Ozarks near Irondale, Missouri and camp. There is no electricity and no indoor plumbing so it is a very extreme version of camping for most people and this year I went. I recorded a video log of the trip. Check it out.

Zombiecon 2012 from Chris Koterba on Vimeo.

In the video I said it was in the upper 80’s, I then said it got cold at night and that I was bad at judging temperature. I found out that it was consistently in the mid to upper 90’s every day we were there and that it got down into the lower 60’s at night. Trying to show the angle of ascent is difficult but you can see it pretty well when I was talking to Alex the cook in the video. I also gave you a tour of my hammock which is a Clark NX-250 Jungle Hammock and was a life saver on this trip. If you're a regular camper, I would suggest trying a hammock out. The rest is so much better! There were people from all over America there. My own chapter (ZS:020 Chicagoland)had a great showing with 9 of our chapter members showing up. We even gathered for a chapter photo.

Photo courtesy of Mystic_1 Members from Canada also make the yearly trek down south to Missouri. Alex (who appears in the video) truly is an outstanding cook. Not only is his food tasty, it’s also made from whatever he has at hand. He’s kind of a culinary A-Team. He got me to try curry which included sardines, two foods that I figured I’d never EVER try! It was excellent. He also introduced us to cheap red wine and Coca-Cola which is a strange but wonderful concoction. We didn’t just sit by the campfire and eat though. On Thursday there were a series of workshops held by various members of ZS. There were seminars on primitive soap making, self-defense, physical education, first-aid, and miniature radio building. Friday found us at a local rifle range where there were various competitions held as well as an open “Shoot n’ Share” where members brought their own guns for others to try out. Around noon a group of local folks showed up consisting of some older folks and some elderly people as well and within minutes, one of our members had one of the gentlemen, who was a veteran, on the line sharing his M-1 Gerund. Several members stopped over by them and chatted with them so that by the time they left there were many handshakes and “thank you’s” exchanged. It was a good time. Saturday’s event was a canoe “float trip” down a river which I didn’t participate in due to my sissyness about canoes (click HERE for a recap). Instead I used the day as a sort of personal day. I did up whatever dirty dishes I found around camp, took the footage you saw above, chatted with whoever was left in camp, and let my mind wander! That night we had a meeting about ZS and its future. We are becoming a 501C3 Non-profit Organization which will help us gain respect in the community and help us do more charity work! We also heard from several chapter leaders on how things were doing in various parts of the country. Every night after dark we watched zombie movies courtesy of a portable generator that was hauled up to base camp by one of the more lovable ZS members affectionately known as “Eggnog”. Most of the zombie films were low budget, obscure films but we did watch “Zombieland” and that movie it even better when watched in the dark, on the side of the mountain with a bunch of friends! Sunday found us packing up camp and hauling back down off the mountain and coming home.

Everyone helped out. Most people hauled their own gear down from camp then went back to help carry everything else down. Those that didn’t help carry helped stage the equipment so it could be taken back to the cabin. This was a great example of how people from across humanity with all different backgrounds and beliefs can come together as a group and exist together through communication and cooperation. As I mentioned, Waukesha was closed down because of a bike race so when I got home I couldn’t park near my apartment to unload. The footage showing the cyclists was from my original final video segment. I ended up scrapping most of it because it didn’t serve this post and was filled with a little more ranting than I felt was appropriate. Instead, as I said, I went upstairs, dumped my gear and showered which helped my perspective and allowed me to shoot a better end piece. I also snapped a picture of the boots I wore all weekend.

These were a Christmas gift from my good friend Mel and they saved me several times from slipping on the rocks and rubble we climbed over all weekend. This trip has been a long time coming. I’ve had ideas of going for the last couple of years but never felt I was ready. I signed up this year as a spur of the moment action that actually concerned me after the fact. Like “(CLICK)..Oh Crap! Now I actually have to do this!!” As I rode home on Sunday I reflected on the past few days and realized just how proud I was that I managed to do it. This was a big challenge for me both physically and mentally and with the support of my ZS friends I made it through and enjoyed a great deal of it. There were a couple of times when I asked myself “Just what the hell do you think you’re doing?” But that was usually around 3 or 4am when I was cold and in need of a restroom. I always ended up answering my question to myself with “I don’t know what I’m doing, but I’m getting it done and it’s more than I thought I could do!” That, to me, was the key. I was doing more than I thought I could and the satisfaction of feeling myself succeed is a sensation I wish everyone could feel for themselves. There are a lot of forces telling us not to look for obstacles, try to find the easiest path so that you don’t have to deal with hardship. However, you can’t fully appreciate the smooth road you’re riding on without walking barefooted down a gravel road. I am lucky in the fact that I got to choose to walk down that road. Many others don’t. Even as I carried my gear, stinking and sore, from the parking garage to my apartment I knew a shower, a bed, and a fan awaited me and I was very thankful. There are a lot of details about this trip that are difficult to put into words and would be diminished by description but I will have the memories for a long time. I do want to thank my buddy Bryan for letting me ride along in his jeep there and back and for the apple! It hit the spot. I’ve been asked if I’ll go again next year. Last Wednesday my answer was, “I’m not sure”; today however, my answer is “yes!” I look forward to the camaraderie, the stories, new experiences and maybe even some more cheap red wine and Coca-Cola.

Communist Bloc Party!!

Several members of Zombie Squad own Mosin-Nagant rifles. Most own them because they are cheap to purchase (around $100 a rifle) and cheap to shoot (about $0.20 a round). Someone suggested that we all get together and have a “Mosin Day” at a local rifle range. Several people were interested so planning commenced. One of the members said that while they didn’t own a Mosin, they did have an SKS which is also Russian and would that be acceptable. It was agreed that the event would be changed to a “Communist-Bloc Party” and that any Russian rifle was allowed to come along.

On Saturday, April 7th I made the drive to Wheeling IL and met up with a couple of friends and we car-pooled to show-up site. Once everyone got to the site we headed over to the Aurora Sportsman Club in Waterman, IL. There were two ZS people who were members at this club and played host to us. We got signed in and set up at one of the ranges.

I brought my 1943 Mosin-Nagant M91/30.



We got our targets placed, went over the range rules and started putting lead down range. It was really interesting to see all the variations people brought.



There were a couple of people who, in addition to “Russian” rifles, brought some other interesting guns. One of the guys brought a couple of AR-15’s he built. My previous experience with this rifle was not great because I kept getting hit in the face when I fired it. I said this to him and he picked one up, extended the stock, and handed to me. After some questions about the electronic gun sights or “optics" I loaded and fired. What a difference! It was easy and enjoyable shooting this gun after a simple “click and slide”. I also got to fire an AK-74.

After some free-for-all firing the group decided to have a shooting contest. Twenty Four “Clay Pigeons” were hung out in a line and six of us each took a shot. If we hit one we got to fire again otherwise it moved to the next shooter. The winner hit five while I only hit one. Hey, I’m a beginner, what did you expect?

After the contest, one of the members brought out a couple of special guns for us to check out. He brought a M1918 B.A.R. (Browning Automatic Rifle) and an Armalite AR-50 Which fires a round like this!



And I got to shoot them!! I apologize for the audio but it was windy that day.

The B.A.R.



The AR-50



When I fired the AR-50 I looked through the scope but didn’t see a mark on the Zombie head I was aiming for. However, as we went to clean up at the end of the day this is what I discovered.

Photo by Mystic_1


After we cleaned up we all headed to a local pub for burgers and conversation. It was a great day with some great people shooting some great guns.

The BAR next to the AK-74


Me with the AR-50
Photo by Firebreatha

Mind over Matter

In horror movies, an effective tool is used to make the audience jump. This is to have the main antagonist appear in an object where, just seconds ago, they were not. A common set up would include a person in front of a medicine cabinet in the bathroom. You see them alone in the room, they open the cabinet to get something, and when they close the cabinet again you see the villain right behind them. There is usually a hard, loud jangle of music which provokes hysterical screams and bowel loosening from the audience. Another popular version of this tactic involves a person innocently looking out the window for danger, scornfully berating their companions for their cowardice, turning back to the window as a flash of lightening illuminates the zombie seconds before it crashes through the window and feasts on the overly confident jerk’s brains. This technique has done wonders for the horror movie industry. However, there have been some side effects. Most notably, to me at least, a couple of years ago while trying to work in my parent’s basement.

As some of you may know, over the years, my parents have graciously allowed me to build a small recording studio in their basement. It is divided up into two rooms. There is the sound room, where the live instruments are played while recording. And the control room where the recording equipment is. The rooms are separated by a wall to help control the sound. In this wall, I installed a window so I can communicate with the musicians performing. I will often spend hours down there writing, recording, or editing songs. A couple of years ago I was attempting to work on an idea that had formed for a song. My parents were out of town at the time, visiting family in Michigan. I had recently watched a brilliant independent movie entitled “28 Days Later” a couple of night previously. This is a different take on the classic “zombie” movie. In this film we join the main character as he regains consciousness after a bicycle accident to find that society has fallen to a virus that has turned nearly everyone in raging, mindlessly violent, blood thirsty animals. There is a particularly spectacular example of the technique mentioned above used in one of the scenes.

So there I was, all alone in the basement of an older house that is surrounded by corn fields; little creaks and groans from the house settling after the sun has gone down. I have, over the years, worked to develop my imagination so that I might write interesting songs and stories or create unusual pieces of art in one form or another. There are, on the other hand, some draw backs to this. When you find yourself all alone in the basement of an older house that is surrounded by cornfields and has a propensity to creak and groan, you may not have the control over your imagination you might have hoped for. I know I didn’t. I sat in the control room; bent over my guitar, trying desperately to work on a song that I knew was going to turn out pretty cool if I could just focus on it. But there was going to be no focus. How could I concentrate on this song when I – just – knew if I looked up, there would be a zombie staring at me through the sound room window? I could not do it. Every creak was the foot step of impending doom heading down the stairs toward me and every groan was the last thing I heard before the brains would be chewed from my skull.

I finally succumbed. I put down my guitar, shut off my computer, and headed for the door. I was pretty cool walking across the basement but as I mounted the steps my pace increased until I blasted out the garage door and practically dove through the window into the front seat of my car. Spraying gravel, I tore away from the house I grew up in with much reproach for my lack of intestinal fortitude. As I was careening out onto the main road my cell phone rang and after a small amount of incontinence, I answered. It turned out to be a good friend of mine asking if I would be interested in; YES! YES! YES! I answered before he finished. The last thing I wanted was to be alone at that moment He said some friends were meeting at a local bar for some drinks. I beat them all there.

Late night at Work.

He sat in front of his computer and waited for the clock on his company phone to say it was seven PM and that it was time for him to leave. It was the day before Thanksgiving and everyone else in the building had left to enjoy the four day weekend. During his employment with the company he had worked all three shift and was familiar with the noises that can be heard in the building between the hours of way too late and far too early which is why the noise had startled him out of a slack jawed stare at the screen in front of him.

This was not a normal noise.

He thought maybe his imagination, which had been Bruce Bannered into a raging behemoth by a steady diet of horror movies and heavy metal, was getting some unnecessary exercise when he heard the noise again. He sat ramrod straight, head tilted with a face full of eyes. He knew that sound. He also knew what that sound meant. Had not “His Majesty King Romero” been educating him on this subject for decades? Despair welled up in him as he realized how woefully unprepared his cubicle was to withstand the assault of what was surely dragging its way toward him.

Zombies

Quickly he pulled himself together and called upon his years of training. Anyone who’s spent time learning the craft of horror movie survival knows in order to kill a zombie you have to “Remove the head or destroy the brain” (Thank you “Shawn of the Dead”). He cast around for weapons but he knew the search was futile. Had he been closer to the shop door he would have access to a veritable buffet of bludgeoning devices. But the situation was this; he was trapped in his office cubicle and surrounded by, what has to be, a vast horde of brain-thirsty zombies and if he was ever going to survive, he needed to stop thinking about what he didn’t have and use what he did.

He looked around. He could throw his monitor. No, it was too heavy and only allowed one shot. There were three ring binders, manuals, office supplies, and coffee cups; none of which would be any good against a swarm of ravenous reanimated corpses. He could hear the seconds’ crash to the floor as they fell from the clock. The grunting, dragging sound of impending disembowelment and consumption grew louder by the moment,

It was then he remembered the wrench! He had loaned the wrench to one of the service mechanics and had gotten it back earlier in the week. It was in the bottom drawer of his desk. He scrabbled for it and pulled it out. Two and a half feet of carbon steel with salvation written all over it felt like a kiss from an angel. It didn’t have all the bells and whistle of ditch blade or even a standard shove or cricket bat but it would do the trick it getting him out of this office and buying him some time so come up with a plan.

He put on his coat, tied his handkerchief around his face, to protect him from flying, infected gore, and slung his bag over his shoulder. He crept toward the entrance of his cubicle and paused to focus his strength. With a mighty bellow that would sound at home in the Halls of Valhalla he leapt out of his cubicle and severely traumatized the innocent cleaning lady who had been trying take out a trash bag someone had carelessly over filled.

He has recently had his hours changed and now leaves with the rest of the employees in his department.