Something for everyone

Sometimes you wander around a store looking for a particular item and when you find the area where they keep the item you’ve been searching for, you find something works better. That happened to me a few weeks ago on the internet.

Back-story
I was in my hometown in Michigan last year for a family reunion. On Saturday mornings there is a farmers market in town, so Mel and I went to check it out. As we were wandering around we came upon a man selling home made soap. We chatted with him for a little bit and I asked if he made any shave soap. He explained that he did but it is only good for shaving with a brush and razor. I explained that I, indeed, use a brush and double edged razor to shave and have been for many years. After some conversation I bought a cake of shave soap and we were on our way.

I was delighted by this soap and when I had used it up I realized that I had no easy way of getting more from that guy at the market. So I turned to the guru on top on the almighty internet mountain known as Google and stared a quest to find this guy. After some searching, I found “Mom and Pop Soap Shop.” After glancing at the “menu” I sent an email asking if they might be the people selling shave soap at the farmers market in Owosso. I received an email stating that they were not but could make some if I ordered it. I thanked them but continued my search for the guy at the market.

A couple of weeks later, I got and email from them asking if I would try a sample of their soap and give them an honest opinion. I replied that I would be delighted to try out their product and that I with thoroughly review their shave soap. A short time later I got a package in the mail with a tin of wonderful smelling shave soap so I got busy testing it and as promised, here is the review.

I have been using a tin of “Bay Rum Spice” shave soap from the “Mom and Pop Soap Shop” located on the internet at http://www.momandpopsoapshop.com/. Based out of Michigan, Mom and Pop offer a wide selection of high quality, hand made soaps. They also offer custom soaps available by request. From the first time I put brush to soap I realized I was in for a treat. The lather produced was rich and full and went on very easy. As I began the shave I noticed I was getting a very smooth shave with a lot less drag than with other soaps I have bought from stores and larger internet suppliers. When I finished with the initial shave I discovered, to my surprise, that I didn’t need to lather up again for a finishing shave. I was smooth to the touch the first time. With store bought soaps, I always had to shave twice to get the smoothness I wanted, even with a new blade. But with soap from Mom and Pop Soap Shop, one pass was all it took. The after scent from the soap was pleasant but not over-powering. I was able to use my standard after-shave with out the two clashing. I have used it for a few weeks now and I will say that I plan on using this soap for the foreseeable future.

Here is my tin of shave soap along with my Tweezerman Soap Brush and my Murker Safety Razor.


The soap comes in a 3 ounce tin with a lid that makes storing the soap very easy. The tin is, however, shaped in such a way that use of a standard sized brush (as seen in the picture) might become a challenge as the soap is consumed. I reported this back to Christine at Mom and Pop and it is being taken into consideration depending on feedback. I also noticed that the paper label doesn’t handle the wet environment of shaving very well but this is such a small matter that it barely deserves commentary. I will be trying out some more of their soap in the near future and am anticipating the same level of excellence there as well. Christine informed me that the shave soaps are $5.50 each and are in 3 scents: Unscented Aloe & Green Tea with Kaolin clay, Spiced Tangerine (Bentonite clay) and Bay Rum Spice (Bentonite clay).

All in all, I will recommend this soap to anyone interested in experiencing just how good shaving can be. If you have any questions there is a link on main page of the website where you can send email inquiries. So go buy some soap and let me know how you liked it!

Happy 4TH!!

Hanging out with friends until 1:30 in the morning drinking wine and laughing
Rock and Roll
Cold pizza for breakfast
Restaurants that serve breakfast food at 9 pm
Walking in the park
Laying out in the sun during your lunch break
Mom’s rhubarb pie
Dad’s chop suey
’58 Plymouth Belvedere
Rambo
Ice Cream Sundaes
Summerfest
The freedom to post whatever you want on the Internet
Driving with the window down and the stereo up
Harley Davidson
The Steaming Cup
Voting
Building friendship regardless of personal political, religious, or ethical views
Getting away from technology and camping and then coming back to technology
The Men and Women who have served this country since it started regardless of the price they had to pay in limb, love and life.
The Men and Women who are, right now, somewhere else in the world, away from their loved ones, putting their lives at risk so that we can enjoy everything we have.
The sound of your girlfriend singing in the shower as you sit in the morning sunshine with a cool breeze while you type a list of things you think about on the 4th of July

Happy Independence Day

My Dad

My Dad married my mom and adopted me legally as his own son.

My Dad used to read with me as a little boy and when I got older would take me to the library to check out books regularly.
My Dad taught me very early in life that there will always be assholes in the world and dealing with them is part of life.
My Dad taught me early in life that life is NOT fair.
My Dad was in Indian guides with me and we did many wonderful things.



My Dad passed to me the knowledge of being a stand up kind of guy.
My Dad used to have me help him fix things around the house even when I was a small boy.
My Dad started "Abretok Industries" and be created many things.
My Dad would send me inside to get him a beer on a hot Saturday afternoon and thank me when I brought it to him, even if it looked a little less full than it should have.

My Dad, along with my Mom, made a very hard decision and moved us to a whole other state, away from all of our family, in order to have a job that didn’t require us to live in Detroit.
My Dad commuted to work from a campground for several weeks while we waited for our new home to be ready for us.
My Dad defended my choice to read a Stephen King book in 5th grade.
My Dad showed me how to used dry wit and sarcasm in a funny way.
My Dad helped me think about things differently.
My Dad, along with my Mom, went through Hell with me to get decent grades in school.
My Dad defended my choice to read a Rush Limbaugh book during study hall in High School.
My Dad, along with my Mom, chose to get me a decent acoustic guitar rather than a Nintendo system.
My Dad said “If you can drive stick shift, you can drive anything.”
My Dad, along with my Mom and Me, were relieved when I graduated.
My Dad allowed me to learn many life lessons on my own, even though I’m sure he very badly wanted to warn me of the consequences of my actions.
My Dad has never “judged” me.
My Dad has never ignored me
My Dad has Never, Ever let me down.
My Dad is someone who I look up to even if I’m taller than him.
My Dad is the best Dad I could ever have because he is the man that loves my Mom and Me better than anyone else can.

Based on real events

A guy I work with told me a story once about his battle with some bee's. The story was great. It involves mowing the lawn, drinking beer, getting stung and over reacting with a shot gun and fire. Just listing those ingredients is enough to bring a smile to someones face. He told me the story and I was compelled, much like Hollywood, to create a story "based on true events." The following is that story



Full Metal Umnuhs
By Chris Koterba
Based on true events

I am a man who likes to mow his lawn. I often proudly pilot my John Deere mower around my two acres of lawn while enjoying the taste of a cold beer. One fine summer day I was out mowing the lawn and as I was making a pass along a row of hedges I was viciously attacked by a Hornet who believed I had invaded his territory and posed an immediate threat to his nest. This attack occurred near the end of the mowing job and it had been a particularly warm day so I was well into my fifth or sixth can of beer by this point. I quickly came to the conclusion that since I was at the top of the food chain and I had planted the hedges the hornets were “defending” not to mention the fact that I paid a ridiculous amount tax on the property the hedges grew on that the hornet’s attack was completely unjustified and warranted an immediate and hostile response.

I went inside and a few minutes later emerged from my house with my 12 gauge. I “army crawled” across my porch so the people driving on I-94 on the other side of my hedges and across the frontage road would see me and jump to some crazy conclusion. I took aim and let one go. I was; however, just close enough so that the shot didn’t have enough time to separate and all I succeeded in doing is blasting a breezeway through the paper nest and infuriating the entire swarm. I didn’t want to chance another shot because I had seen several movies and believed I knew about triangulation. I quickly scuttled back into the house, put down my gun and ran outside to the garage. I had another idea. Since my sniper moves had proven unsuccessful, I decided napalm was my next best option.

I had another beer while I put together the mission. I looked around and found a weed sprayer and filled it with gasoline. I shifted my John Deere into a higher gear and made three or four passes with the sprayer until I determined the area was doused properly. I then began my ignition run. I had prepared a Rambo style torch by wrapping several shop rags around on end of a tree branch and soaking them in kerosene. I lit it and piloted my Greene Bomber past the kill zone and with a mighty roar I hurled the torch…..over the hedge and into the ditch on the other side. I retrieved my torch, put out the burning grass it had started, got stung again, and tried a second time. This time I went Ninja style and crept as close to ground zero as I dared and shot the torch like a dart. Success! The hedge was on fire! It grew a bit quicker that I had expected and soon I had to run to grab the garden hose and put out the fire that was making its way through the hedge and toward my house.

I stood there surveying my war torn lawn and feeling very Thor like when I was stung three more times! Like a man plagued with Demons, I hopped, shimmied, and jerked around the front lawn. As I stood in my garage planning my next sortie, I saw my wife calmly walk out of the house, sprayed the paper nest and a ground nest (I hadn’t noticed) in the same area, looked at me, and go back inside shaking her head. Her smugness was not appreciated.

The End



I would like to point out that my friend is not a drunken lunatic with no common sense and limited cognitive abilities. He is actually quite knowledgeable about many different topics, especially the safe, proper, and responsible handling of firearms. I in no way mean to slight him with this story. I said above, this is a story based on true event. The actual details of the story should be shared by the man who witnessed them.

The Creation of Trees

Photo by Mel Vyvyan

I was recently commissioned to design and create some metal sculptures of bonsai trees for a friends wedding to be used as center pieces. We had been hanging out at our apartment when they noticed a sculpture I had done with some scrap metal and asked if I could build a bonsai tree. I said I’d give it a try and see what happens. I went into work on a Friday and experimented with a design that failed miserable. I pondered this for a few days and then tried again. This time I was more satisfied with the outcome. I took some pictures and sent them off for approval. I got an enthusiastic thumbs-up so I built seven more for a total of eight metal bonsai trees.

When you work in a shop with a bunch of guys using big tools around giant trucks, you have to resign yourself to some intense questioning when you start doing anything remotely artistic. There are questions about what you are trying to do, why you are doing it, what your sexual orientation is, and whether or not you are going to “flounce about” when you are done with your artsy fartsy nonsense. This interrogation was done all in fun and everyone wanted to know how they came out and wanted to see pictures of them.

I am now going to get a little artsy fartsy with you now. Much like the traditional method of trimming and coaxing the vegetation into a desirable shape, I found that creating these metal renditions produced a similar meditative experience. As I heated and bent the steel this way and that, something occurred to me. These trees could be viewed as a representation of how we must work not only at relationships, but also life. The paths we take from beginning to end are often strangely curved with little reason other then by the will that guides it.

Creating these trees was methodical; each one consists of a 4” by 4” square channel base, a 16” length of steel rod and a 6” length of ¼” steel rod. Each tree was welded with the same machine; heated and bent by the same guy with the same torch, and most were bent on the same day yet each one is different. There are no two alike. Each tree was a different path in the same direction toward the same destination.

The last realization I had occurred while putting the “foliage” on the trunks. After I had welded and bent them into shape I painted them and tossed them into my car to take them home and finish them up there. They were chunks of steel that I could have dropped out the window on the freeway and suffered little more damage that some scraped paint. However as I started sculpting the tufts of steel wool the entire tree took a breath of life and instantly became very delicate. This is an interesting idea. Aside from the epoxy agent used to hold the foliage on the trunk, this tree is entirely made out of steel. Steel stock can be extremely strong and difficult to damage, while steel wool can be easily pulled apart and destroyed. A person could view love and relationships in a similar way. Love can be so strong it convinces a person to live when everything else is against them and yet a relationship can be destroyed in a few simple words.

As I was working on these I took some photographs and video footage because I wanted to make a “Behind the Tree” episode for the Newlywed’s. The bride is a known “Star Wars” fan and the Groom is a “Firefly” Browncoat if I ever met one so I used these elements in the movie. I have waited until after the wedding to post this so that they could have this to themselves for their special day. It was a great honor to do this for them and I thank them for the opportunity.