Monday, December 14, 2009
Sit in with "Francesca and Friends"!!
I recently captured some footage of us rehearsing a Dave Carter tune called "Crocodile Man". I was curious about the quality of my cameras movie capturing so I tested it out on this song and it's not that bad so I thought I would share it. I hope you enjoy.
PS. Evidently the footage can be a little cranky to get to play, However, if you reload the page, it should work. Let me know if it doesn't work for you and I will look into it.
Thanks
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Late night at Work.
He sat in front of his computer and waited for the clock on his company phone to say it was seven PM and that it was time for him to leave. It was the day before Thanksgiving and everyone else in the building had left to enjoy the four day weekend. During his employment with the company he had worked all three shift and was familiar with the noises that can be heard in the building between the hours of way too late and far too early which is why the noise had startled him out of a slack jawed stare at the screen in front of him.
This was not a normal noise.
He thought maybe his imagination, which had been Bruce Bannered into a raging behemoth by a steady diet of horror movies and heavy metal, was getting some unnecessary exercise when he heard the noise again. He sat ramrod straight, head tilted with a face full of eyes. He knew that sound. He also knew what that sound meant. Had not “His Majesty King Romero” been educating him on this subject for decades? Despair welled up in him as he realized how woefully unprepared his cubicle was to withstand the assault of what was surely dragging its way toward him.
Zombies
Quickly he pulled himself together and called upon his years of training. Anyone who’s spent time learning the craft of horror movie survival knows in order to kill a zombie you have to “Remove the head or destroy the brain” (Thank you “Shawn of the Dead”). He cast around for weapons but he knew the search was futile. Had he been closer to the shop door he would have access to a veritable buffet of bludgeoning devices. But the situation was this; he was trapped in his office cubicle and surrounded by, what has to be, a vast horde of brain-thirsty zombies and if he was ever going to survive, he needed to stop thinking about what he didn’t have and use what he did.
He looked around. He could throw his monitor. No, it was too heavy and only allowed one shot. There were three ring binders, manuals, office supplies, and coffee cups; none of which would be any good against a swarm of ravenous reanimated corpses. He could hear the seconds’ crash to the floor as they fell from the clock. The grunting, dragging sound of impending disembowelment and consumption grew louder by the moment,
It was then he remembered the wrench! He had loaned the wrench to one of the service mechanics and had gotten it back earlier in the week. It was in the bottom drawer of his desk. He scrabbled for it and pulled it out. Two and a half feet of carbon steel with salvation written all over it felt like a kiss from an angel. It didn’t have all the bells and whistle of ditch blade or even a standard shove or cricket bat but it would do the trick it getting him out of this office and buying him some time so come up with a plan.
He put on his coat, tied his handkerchief around his face, to protect him from flying, infected gore, and slung his bag over his shoulder. He crept toward the entrance of his cubicle and paused to focus his strength. With a mighty bellow that would sound at home in the Halls of Valhalla he leapt out of his cubicle and severely traumatized the innocent cleaning lady who had been trying take out a trash bag someone had carelessly over filled.
He has recently had his hours changed and now leaves with the rest of the employees in his department.
This was not a normal noise.
He thought maybe his imagination, which had been Bruce Bannered into a raging behemoth by a steady diet of horror movies and heavy metal, was getting some unnecessary exercise when he heard the noise again. He sat ramrod straight, head tilted with a face full of eyes. He knew that sound. He also knew what that sound meant. Had not “His Majesty King Romero” been educating him on this subject for decades? Despair welled up in him as he realized how woefully unprepared his cubicle was to withstand the assault of what was surely dragging its way toward him.
Zombies
Quickly he pulled himself together and called upon his years of training. Anyone who’s spent time learning the craft of horror movie survival knows in order to kill a zombie you have to “Remove the head or destroy the brain” (Thank you “Shawn of the Dead”). He cast around for weapons but he knew the search was futile. Had he been closer to the shop door he would have access to a veritable buffet of bludgeoning devices. But the situation was this; he was trapped in his office cubicle and surrounded by, what has to be, a vast horde of brain-thirsty zombies and if he was ever going to survive, he needed to stop thinking about what he didn’t have and use what he did.
He looked around. He could throw his monitor. No, it was too heavy and only allowed one shot. There were three ring binders, manuals, office supplies, and coffee cups; none of which would be any good against a swarm of ravenous reanimated corpses. He could hear the seconds’ crash to the floor as they fell from the clock. The grunting, dragging sound of impending disembowelment and consumption grew louder by the moment,
It was then he remembered the wrench! He had loaned the wrench to one of the service mechanics and had gotten it back earlier in the week. It was in the bottom drawer of his desk. He scrabbled for it and pulled it out. Two and a half feet of carbon steel with salvation written all over it felt like a kiss from an angel. It didn’t have all the bells and whistle of ditch blade or even a standard shove or cricket bat but it would do the trick it getting him out of this office and buying him some time so come up with a plan.
He put on his coat, tied his handkerchief around his face, to protect him from flying, infected gore, and slung his bag over his shoulder. He crept toward the entrance of his cubicle and paused to focus his strength. With a mighty bellow that would sound at home in the Halls of Valhalla he leapt out of his cubicle and severely traumatized the innocent cleaning lady who had been trying take out a trash bag someone had carelessly over filled.
He has recently had his hours changed and now leaves with the rest of the employees in his department.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
The Email
Below you will find an email I sent to my department head regarding a scenario I encountered at work. I wrote the email partly out of exasperation at my ineptitude and frustration that this event was unforeseen and unprepared for. I have changed the names of those involved for a variety of reasons. I hope you enjoy.
***************************************************************************************************************
Tim,
With much excitement I received a visit from Customer Bob and his wife last night. After an entertaining round of "Where's Dueco" via the telephone, Bob arrived. Resplendent in his flannel shirt and blue jeans, Bob explained that he had spoken with parts sales earlier in the day and was informed that if he made the pilgrimage from home he would be able to match up and purchase a PTO Flange and a hydraulic pump from Dueco Inc. He was also led to believe that paying for the merchandise with cash would present no problem. Being the eager to please parts guy I am, I bounded off to match up pump and PTO flange. I succeeded in finding both parts much to Bob’s delight.
However, when it came time to process the monetary aspects of this transaction, it became woefully clear that I have no Idea how to calculate sales tax for someone from out of state. Proceedings were further hampered by the fact that I was completely unable to make change. My mind raced as I tried to find the $5.72 Earl needed to satisfy the mathematical arm of our encounter. I strode into the office and went to the first door I saw which was Co Worker A’s office. It was she who offered the suggestion of getting change from Co Worker B’s Slush Fund. I headed back to our patiently awaiting customer, change in hand. We completed our transaction and I wished him a safe and direct trip home with one of my business cards and some literature about Dueco Inc.
The funds ($1000 cash) and Hand written order for Bob is in your locked drawer with the Key for Upstairs. I’m sure you have found it already. Please be sure that B receives the $5.72 we owe her. Next week I would like to address the elements of this experience which I have yet to master like sales tax and change availability. I hope you have a grand weekend.
Sincerely,
Dueco Inc.
Chris Koterba
Parts Coordinator
Your source for
Telelect, Hi-Ranger & Stelco parts
***************************************************************************************************************
Tim,
With much excitement I received a visit from Customer Bob and his wife last night. After an entertaining round of "Where's Dueco" via the telephone, Bob arrived. Resplendent in his flannel shirt and blue jeans, Bob explained that he had spoken with parts sales earlier in the day and was informed that if he made the pilgrimage from home he would be able to match up and purchase a PTO Flange and a hydraulic pump from Dueco Inc. He was also led to believe that paying for the merchandise with cash would present no problem. Being the eager to please parts guy I am, I bounded off to match up pump and PTO flange. I succeeded in finding both parts much to Bob’s delight.
However, when it came time to process the monetary aspects of this transaction, it became woefully clear that I have no Idea how to calculate sales tax for someone from out of state. Proceedings were further hampered by the fact that I was completely unable to make change. My mind raced as I tried to find the $5.72 Earl needed to satisfy the mathematical arm of our encounter. I strode into the office and went to the first door I saw which was Co Worker A’s office. It was she who offered the suggestion of getting change from Co Worker B’s Slush Fund. I headed back to our patiently awaiting customer, change in hand. We completed our transaction and I wished him a safe and direct trip home with one of my business cards and some literature about Dueco Inc.
The funds ($1000 cash) and Hand written order for Bob is in your locked drawer with the Key for Upstairs. I’m sure you have found it already. Please be sure that B receives the $5.72 we owe her. Next week I would like to address the elements of this experience which I have yet to master like sales tax and change availability. I hope you have a grand weekend.
Sincerely,
Dueco Inc.
Chris Koterba
Parts Coordinator
Your source for
Telelect, Hi-Ranger & Stelco parts
Thursday, August 13, 2009
A Moment of Sound
Last year, my girlfriend told me she had a surprise for me as an early anniversary gift. I waited in suspense for over a week until the day came. June 21st 2008, a Saturday, we got into her car and headed into Milwaukee. On the way there I began to have suspicions about where we were going due to a billboard we passed. My suspicions were confirmed. She had gotten us tickets to see Les Paul perform at a celebration for his 93rd birthday. I was speechless, not to mention excited.
My introduction to Les Paul was typical of my age group. One of my guitar heroes, Slash, is known for playing Les Paul guitars. At some point my dad told me that the guitar was named for its creator. We went to the library, this was before the internet and Youtube was likely something you’d only find in Porno store, and checked out a couple of his records. That’s right, records. I first heard Les Paul like many of his fans did, on vinyl. I didn’t know what to make of what I heard but I liked it and listen to them several times before returning them to the library. As I grew up I learned just how much he influenced the music I loved and the industry that helped create it.
We made our way to our seats in the Pabst Theater and the excitement grew. We were way up in the seating but even then we had great seats and could see very well. The lights dimmed and the crowd roared and Mr. Paul came out, got in his chair and blew my mind! I have seen countless times footage of people crying hysterically whilst their favorite musical group was performing and never really understood it. I still don’t. I will tell you, and I am sharing a very personal moment with you friends, throughout the first set I was continuously plagued with a lump in my throat and a blur to my vision. I can’t explain why I was as moved as I was but it seemed like I was touched by greatness and gifted with a sense of joy the likes of which I really have never felt before. Maybe it was seeing a legend, or hearing a 93 year old man play with a love for music that flowed from fingers shaped like the roots of an ancient bonsai tree, or it could have been the smile on his face, a smile that cold warm the soul in the heart of the coldest winter. I think it was this; I was in a large room filled with happy people all focused on one thing; music.
As we left that night, I was buzzing slightly from head to toe. We were walking back toward Mel’s car when I noticed that one of the buildings near the theater had its windows filled with colored plastic and that when seen at the right angle created the shape of a Les Paul guitar. I was the first one on the side walk to notice it and my exclamation, although maybe not as polite as was called for, drew the attention of many others in the area and soon cell phones and cameras were flashing away.
I am so entirely thankful to my sweet Mel for giving me memories I will cherish forever. So I offer this suggestion, in Mr. Paul’s memory, choose some of your favorite songs and listen to them and enjoy them with your whole self. I believe that is what he would want.
I solute you Les Paul.
Thank You
My introduction to Les Paul was typical of my age group. One of my guitar heroes, Slash, is known for playing Les Paul guitars. At some point my dad told me that the guitar was named for its creator. We went to the library, this was before the internet and Youtube was likely something you’d only find in Porno store, and checked out a couple of his records. That’s right, records. I first heard Les Paul like many of his fans did, on vinyl. I didn’t know what to make of what I heard but I liked it and listen to them several times before returning them to the library. As I grew up I learned just how much he influenced the music I loved and the industry that helped create it.
We made our way to our seats in the Pabst Theater and the excitement grew. We were way up in the seating but even then we had great seats and could see very well. The lights dimmed and the crowd roared and Mr. Paul came out, got in his chair and blew my mind! I have seen countless times footage of people crying hysterically whilst their favorite musical group was performing and never really understood it. I still don’t. I will tell you, and I am sharing a very personal moment with you friends, throughout the first set I was continuously plagued with a lump in my throat and a blur to my vision. I can’t explain why I was as moved as I was but it seemed like I was touched by greatness and gifted with a sense of joy the likes of which I really have never felt before. Maybe it was seeing a legend, or hearing a 93 year old man play with a love for music that flowed from fingers shaped like the roots of an ancient bonsai tree, or it could have been the smile on his face, a smile that cold warm the soul in the heart of the coldest winter. I think it was this; I was in a large room filled with happy people all focused on one thing; music.
As we left that night, I was buzzing slightly from head to toe. We were walking back toward Mel’s car when I noticed that one of the buildings near the theater had its windows filled with colored plastic and that when seen at the right angle created the shape of a Les Paul guitar. I was the first one on the side walk to notice it and my exclamation, although maybe not as polite as was called for, drew the attention of many others in the area and soon cell phones and cameras were flashing away.
I am so entirely thankful to my sweet Mel for giving me memories I will cherish forever. So I offer this suggestion, in Mr. Paul’s memory, choose some of your favorite songs and listen to them and enjoy them with your whole self. I believe that is what he would want.
I solute you Les Paul.
Thank You
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Trivia
1. My Favorite number is 42. For the reason why this is, please read “The Hitch-hikers Guide to the Galaxy” by Douglas Adams.
2. I have worn steel toed Boots since 10th grade. At the time I wore them for going to concerts so my feet didn’t get stomped on in mosh pits, plus I like the style. Now I wear them because they are required by my employer, plus I like the style.
3. I am left handed but play the guitar in the traditional right handed method. There are many things in which I am ambidextrous but I am a proud South Paw.
4. I cannot kneel down on my left knee to tie my shoe. I always end up falling over. I have no idea why.
5. I was born in October of 1974 and moved to Wisconsin when I was nine in 1986. I started working at my currant job at Dueco in May of 1996 which means I have spent over half of my life in Wisconsin working for Dueco Inc.
6. I have a phobia of Bees and Hornets and Wasps and such even though I am not seriously allergic to them.
7. I have dreams with a reoccurring theme; I always end up getting shot.
8. I once performed with Bluefire in a chicken house that was cleaned out in order to hold a party.
9. I have never smoked anything in my life, however; I believe a smoking ban is an unconstitutional and grievous intrusion of the government on private business owners.
10. I don’t have a problem with homosexual people getting married
2. I have worn steel toed Boots since 10th grade. At the time I wore them for going to concerts so my feet didn’t get stomped on in mosh pits, plus I like the style. Now I wear them because they are required by my employer, plus I like the style.
3. I am left handed but play the guitar in the traditional right handed method. There are many things in which I am ambidextrous but I am a proud South Paw.
4. I cannot kneel down on my left knee to tie my shoe. I always end up falling over. I have no idea why.
5. I was born in October of 1974 and moved to Wisconsin when I was nine in 1986. I started working at my currant job at Dueco in May of 1996 which means I have spent over half of my life in Wisconsin working for Dueco Inc.
6. I have a phobia of Bees and Hornets and Wasps and such even though I am not seriously allergic to them.
7. I have dreams with a reoccurring theme; I always end up getting shot.
8. I once performed with Bluefire in a chicken house that was cleaned out in order to hold a party.
9. I have never smoked anything in my life, however; I believe a smoking ban is an unconstitutional and grievous intrusion of the government on private business owners.
10. I don’t have a problem with homosexual people getting married
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